


Fake love

by 1d4gd



Series: Soft!Hoseok is 💚 [2]
Category: K-pop, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe - Babies, Alternate Universe - Idols, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, BTS is whipped for Hoseok, Bottom Jung Hoseok | J-Hope, DON'T SAY YOU HAVEN'T BEEN WARNED, Depressed Jung Hoseok | J-Hope, Drama, He runs away, Hoseokie is a sad bean, Jeon Jungkook Is Bad at Feelings, Jung Hoseok | J-Hope Is a Sweetheart, Jung Hoseok | J-Hope-centric, Kim Namjoon | RM Is Bad at Feelings, Kim Seokjin | Jin Is Bad at Feelings, Kim Taehyung | V Is Bad at Feelings, M/M, Min Yoongi | Suga Is Bad at Feelings, Mpreg, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Park Jimin (BTS) Is Bad At Feelings, Romance, Running Away, Sad, Sad Jung Hoseok | J-Hope, Temporarily Unrequited Love, Top Jeon Jungkook, Top Kim Namjoon | RM, Top Kim Seokjin | Jin, Top Kim Taehyung | V, Top Min Yoongi | Suga, Top Park Jimin (BTS), but Hoseok feels neglected and makes bad decisions, but they're also selfish and childish, he thinks BTS doesn't love him, heartbroken, please love J-Hopieeeeeeeeeeeeee, thank youuuuuuuuuu, they're all dating - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-24
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2020-05-18 23:03:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19344466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1d4gd/pseuds/1d4gd
Summary: Hoseok’s tried to convince himself that what they feel for him is more than fake love. But he’s tired and broken and ready to move on. They only want him when the mood strikes, and he doesn’t want to play the willing toy anymore. Never again.





	1. For you I could pretend I was happy

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone. This was meant as a drabble but I am thinking of making it into a chaptered fic. I would really appreciate it if you could leave some feedback. I know it's quite sad but if I do decide to add more chapters there will be a happy ending 'cause you know me. I could never hurt Hobi like that. 😭
> 
> Let me know what you think and let's keep on 💚 Hoseok and BTS!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hoseok decides to run away...ಠ_ಥ

               Hoseok can’t help but wonder why is he the only one no one loves for real. He finds it almost ironic how fake the love the others have for him feels. How it leaves him dirty and pathetic because he can’t ask for more. Not if he wants to receive any affection in the first place. He silently suffers and bears with it. It hurts though. So, so much. There are days in which he wants to scream his pain, but he knows better. It wouldn’t change anything. He’s the unwanted one in their relationship and he thinks they shouldn’t even bother pretending anymore. What’s the point anyway? He will never be loved by them. Not in the way it matters.

Little by little, he stops speaking. They don’t like him when he’s being too loud. They also hate it when he begs for their attention, so he doesn’t do that either anymore. His heart petrifies and when he’s asked to please his fans by holding hands with Jungkook or hugging Jimin, his first reaction is to refuse. He can’t act as if he’s not completely breaking apart in front of everyone. He’s tired of smiling and acting the usual clown.

He keeps to himself a lot and with some well-placed lies, also manages to get his own room. It’s better this way. Also, this is not a movie, nobody will come and save him. But there’s not much left to save to begin with so he’s better off on his own. Reality is starting to weigh him down and he can’t help but want to find a save heaven to take refuge into. They’ll try to convince him otherwise, but he needs a break and he needs it now.

It’s only too bad that’s when they seem to notice him getting more unfeeling lately. Jimin makes it a mission to follow him everywhere but the attention tastes bitter on his tongue now. He doesn’t need any second-hand affection and he for sure doesn’t appreciate being touched only when the mood strikes. The problem is there are six of them and they can be damn stubborn when they put their mind to it.

He can’t escape their 'claws', not when he’s never been able to resist them. His heart might hate it, but his body loves the way they touch him. Loves being held by them. Loves how talented they are at breaking him. He tries to fight it, but his heart is getting corrupted again and it doesn’t take long before he’s back to clinging onto them and asking for their affection. It’s sickening how weak he is to their charms. He’ll never escape this pleasurable torture. Their caresses are forever engraved into his soul and he’s going to die with the certainty that he’s the only one who loves for real.

He’s an idiot but being human usually comes with making some pretty terrible decisions. Like falling in love with your bandmates when you know damn well they only use you for physical release. Or hoping that they would one day fall for you when you are perfectly aware they never would. Why would they when you have nothing to offer them? He curses himself for acting so sensitive and touchy when he has no right to do so. They’ve never promised more to him.

The day he learns he is pregnant is the worst day of his life. He despairs over what he could do about it, but the answer is simple enough. Run away. Go somewhere where they can never find him. Raise his baby and learn how to love himself again. Grow stronger with each passing second. Let them be happy together and hoping it wouldn’t take long before they completely forget all about him. That shouldn’t be too hard since he’s never really meant anything to them. All they have for him is fake love and he doesn’t want that anymore. Never again.


	2. I don't know, I don't know why

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BTS realize Hobi has left them. (ಥ﹏ಥ)

                Yoongi is the first one to realize that Hoseok is missing. He assumes the younger might have decided to spend some days with his family but still, the fact that he hadn’t told them about it appears very suspicious to him. He asks the others, but they just shrug their shoulders. He can’t help the fear and the anger that comes with the revelation that their boyfriend had decided to take off on his own. He calls Hobi a few times and leaves quite a few of slightly threatening messages because this is plain ridiculous.

When he doesn’t get any reply whatsoever, he begins feeling a little more worried. He ends up contacting Hoseok’s parents and sister, but they haven’t heard from him in days. The terror finally settles in and he calls in an urgent meeting to try and figure out what to do next.

‘Hobi is missing…’

‘What do you mean he’s missing? He’d never leave without our explicit permission.’ Jimin states.

‘Apparently he just did because he’s not picking up any of my calls and his friends and family have no news of him.’

Taeyung is beginning to feel really anxious about this whole situation.

‘But how can that be? Hoseok is not irresponsible like that. Plus, he knows he gets easily scared on his own.’

‘I am not sure what his reasons for leaving are Tae, but we need to find him. Fast.’

‘I can’t believe he’d do something like this! What is he thinking?’

‘I am assuming not much at the moment Kook. Did he seem upset lately?’

‘I did notice him acting a bit colder. But nothing out of the ordinary.’

‘You know how good of an actor he can be sometimes. With him, you never know what he’s truly feeling in his heart.’

‘Jimin is right. The fact that he didn’t tell us about it means he doesn’t trust us right now. The question is why.’

‘That’s what I really want to find out Jin. I really hope he’s fine though.’

‘He is Joon, don’t worry too much, alright? We’ll find him. I promise you.’

‘I know we will hyung but I can’t help but feel like he’s blaming us for something, otherwise why would he run away from us like that?’

‘I am certain we can solve any problem as long as we are completely honest about it.’

‘Maybe I shouldn’t say this, but I noticed him being sick a couple of times. Also, he looked so pale. What if there’s really something wrong with him?’

‘Don’t worry Jiminie. Even if he does feel a bit ill, we’ll take care of him. We only need to find him now and bring him back.’

‘What if he doesn’t want to come back? What then?’

‘What do you mean Tae? Why wouldn’t he wish to do so?’

‘Because he’s been looking so sad lately. I think all of us noticed him being more introverted and shier than usual. There were a few times when he flinched when I touched him, almost as if he were afraid I might hit him. This made me really concerned but I kept to myself. Now I know I shouldn’t have because Hobi needed us and I’ve acted like a coward.’

‘It’s not your fault Tae. I believe we’ve all been acting a little mean to him lately. The stress and this hectic lifestyle are not helping anyone relax.’

‘I know Joon, but this is not an excuse for treating him badly. We’re all responsible for making Hobi cry.’

‘I know Jin but we can’t turn back time. We have to find him now and make him see how much we care about him.’

‘I don’t think it’s going to be that easy. But our Seokie deserves to be loved and we need to apologize for acting like such selfish jerks.’

‘You’re perfectly right Kook. That’s exactly what we’re going to do. Now I am going to call our managers and organize a small search party. We need to go to all his favorite places and not only. He might have also gone back to Gwangju so we need to look there too. His sister can help with that. I think worrying his parents more than necessary wouldn’t serve any purpose. Let’s do our best to find him before things get worse.’

Yoongi was beginning to get more nervous by the second. Hoseok was missing and they had no clue where he could be. He felt quite ashamed about it, but he’d never been interested in learning more about what his lover liked to do in his free time. Sometimes he’d go exploring on his own and not return for days. He wished that was the case even though he’d never left without telling somebody about it.

 -----------------------------------------------------------

The truth was all of them were going out of their minds with worry. When a week passes and nothing happens, Jimin is close to tears because their Seokie is somewhere in this world and they might not be able to find him. They’ve acted so cocky towards their beautiful sunshine and this was their punishment for treating him like a convenient release sometimes.

They had no excuse for treating Hoseok like their pretty doll, defenseless and vulnerable. He can’t remember the last time he’d ever taken their boyfriend out on a date or bought him some nice flowers. He’s wrongly assumed that their gorgeous hyung would never get tired of being treated as an accessory.

He was beginning to realize they weren’t worthy of such a selfless soul and if Hobi decided to never see them again, it would be nothing less than they deserved. Stupid! Stupid! They’ve all been so stupid and careless, and the time had come for them to pay for all their sins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello. So I decided to continue this. Hoseok needs to get his happy ending and I will MAKE it happen! Your feedback means a lot so please don't stop commenting. 
> 
> P.S: Kudos are 🧡💛💚💙💜 too! Thank you!!!


	3. I'm so sorry but...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hope is not coming back...😢

              Weeks pass and there’s still no news of Hoseok. The media has caught on and they’ve been releasing all kinds of interviews and articles about the reason why J-Hope might have decided to leave the band. They insinuate all kinds of things and it takes the BigHit president’s speech to make them back of a little. Not by much but eventually the scoop grows old and they stop coming up with all kinds of ridiculous theories.

Hope is still missing though, and their hearts keep getting broken every time someone tries to sell them fake information about where their main dancer might be. It’s almost ironic how hope is the only thing they have left. Jungkook is still incredulous about the turn of events and he’s still imagining Hoseok entering their apartment one day with his usual sunny smile. He even dreams about their boyfriend. His mind is only filled with thoughts of Hobi and he’s convinced he will end up going crazy soon.

The pain cuts through them and leaves ugly scars. The guilt is only increasing and the desperation too. They’ve come up with thousands of scenarios for their lover’s sudden disappearance, but nothing makes sense anymore. Their lives feel bitter and dark and there’s no point in hoping for anything to change because it won’t. They’ve probably lost the only person capable of making them truly happy and they’re not getting him back.

Moving on is a foreign concept to them and no matter how many days or weeks pass, the sadness never passes. They cry and mourn together but there’s no use. Their Hobi left and the thought of not knowing what happened to him will haunt them forever.

Little by little their group falls apart. Hoseok was the glue holding them together and without him there’s no more love or happiness to write about. Yoongi and Namjoon have exhausted themselves with writing their agony and Jimin can’t enter the practice room he and their boyfriend used to share without bursting into tears.

They decide to officially disband. BTS will never be complete without J-Hope and the memories are too disturbing to allow them to continue on this path. It’s better this way.

Two years pass and none of them has learnt how to start living again yet. They struggle and argue with everyone around them. Nobody can help them but they’re not really looking for that. The ache keeps them grounded and suffering is beginning to look a lot like a blessing. Their only happy time is when they dream about Hoseok. Dream of them being together again. Dream about getting married and having children together. About spending the rest of their lives with each other. It’s pathetic but it’s the only way to keep their beautiful sunshine with them.

  -----------------------------------------------------------

Hoseok is not sure he’ll ever want to go back. He’d seen the things they had written about him and watched his ex-boyfriends hurting because of him. His family knows where he is, but they’ve agreed to keep the secret. His little girl is growing stronger and more beautiful every day and he’ll never stop being thankful to them for giving him such a precious gift.

However, he’s not ready to forgive yet and if he were completely honest, the day might never come after all. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t miss them though. He did. So, so much. His dreams are always filled with their smiles and their laughs and their kisses. He feels completely drained when he wakes up but then his beautiful baby is looking at him with those big, gorgeous eyes of hers and he instantly feels better. There’s no doubt in his mind that he can do anything and everything as long as he has his adorable Sowon with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone. I am really curious to know what you think. Do you think BTS will ever be reunited Or that the others will find out about Sowon? 😭
> 
> I chose Sowon because it means Hope in Korean and I believe that's very fitting of Hoseok's baby girl (◕‿◕✿)
> 
> P.S: I know the story might get a little confusing but I imagined it to be like a collection of moments in their relationship and lives. I hope you'll still like it though!!! Thank you!!! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜


	4. Love you so bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> BTS finally finds Hoseok...

                  Hoseok’s not sure how they manage to find him, but they do. It happens three years after he’s left everything behind. He’s getting Sowon dressed so that they can go and have a small walk in the park when the doorbell rings. He’s thinking it must be one of his nosy neighbors again but since he’s always been courteous and sweet, he decides to answer. They’re probably trying to borrow some sugar again.

He opens the door and promptly freezes. The shock makes his knees collapse but before he can drop to the ground, he feels strong arms wrapping around his waist. Jungkook. How did they find him? How? His mind is running a mile and he’s beginning to hyperventilate because this is the last thing he could’ve expected to happen to him on this day. He’s panicking hard and thankfully enough they take mercy on him allowing him to sit on the couch to regain his breath.

They get him some water and then they stare. For what feels like an eternity but what in reality is probably only a few minutes. He can hear Sowon fussing in her bed and that’s when the real horror settles in. Do they know about her too? He rushes to her room and picks her up. She makes kissy faces at him and he can’t really enjoy how cute his daughter is because there’s a hurricane about to hit him in the living room and he can’t even make an escape for it.

He re-enters the room with his baby girl in his arms and with his heart in his throat. Their reactions are exquisite, and he feels almost avenged just by the look in their eyes. They all look like they might fall apart any minute now and he can’t even blame them. Their little baby is absolutely stunning. She’s wearing a pink frilly dress and her dark hair is flowing around her tiny shoulders. Her big eyes are wide with curiosity and when she makes grabby hands at Jimin, the nerve-wracking tension in the room depletes.

Hoseok is still slightly shaking but he can’t refuse his baby girl’s wish. That’s one of her fathers sitting awkwardly into one of the chairs in the room. Jimin is taking small steps towards them almost as if he’s afraid he might decide to flee after all. The temptation is there for a second, but he can’t keep running from this. His Sowon will always be theirs too. Jimin carefully takes their tiny daughter into his arms and that’s when the tears start flowing down his cheeks. He appears positively overwhelmed but in a good way. He sits with her on the chair once more and he gently touches her face.

There’s absolute reverence in his eyes and when he looks around the others look the same. Almost as if they can’t believe they were capable of conceiving something so small but so perfect at the same time. He almost giggles at their stunned expressions but he stops himself right in time.

This is not the moment for acting silly, not when his peaceful life has been turned on its head. Their gazes alternate between him and their baby and the love he can read into their eyes feels foreign somehow. He can’t remember them looking at him like that before but maybe he’s the one who’s been blind all along.

They need to talk but this can probably wait for another hour our too. It’s clear they all want to bond with Sowon and he will let them. It’s their right and Hoseok would never be cruel enough to fight them on this.

He loves watching them together too. Loves seeing Jungkook pat her tiny head and watching Taehyung let their daughter wrap her small fist around his finger. His hands are so big compared to hers and she appears very much fascinated by that. A memory of Tae caressing him all over his body with those skillful hands pops into his mind, and he can tell he’s blushing when the younger gives him a knowing look.

The truth is he’d never stopped wanting or loving them. The feelings will never fade and seeing them again is making him realize that he’ll never be able to go back to living without them. He’d doomed. Undeniably doomed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello. I hope you liked this chapter. Weren't they super cute and soft? 
> 
> P.S: Comments and kudos are wonderful! Thank you!!! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
> 
> P.P.S: If you're craving some Junghope I posted a new fic. Have a look [HERE](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19435390/chapters/46254748).


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